How is this so difficult?

Why is it so difficult for me to keep up with my blog? I wish I had the answer. My daughter does it so beautifully, but obviously she doesn't get it from me. Once again, this is my attempt to capture our days in a blog.

What have Pop and I been up to? Being really hungry!!! Not really. We are both doing weight watchers and we feel like we are being deprived, but the truth is that we are not at all. I have done ww in the past and decided to go back to it because it is the one program that is tried and true. I am loving the new point system, because you can have all the fresh fruit and vegetables that you want and they have no point value. To me, this is big. It has been my saving grace. I am actually going to ww and weighing in, but Pop is just following the program and weighing at home. The first week I lost 13.2 lbs. This was a great boost to keep me motivated. The second week I lost only 1.2 lbs. but it was a loss. The third week I lost 5.2 lbs. This makes a total of 19.6 lbs. gone. I weight in tonight, so we will see. It is very hard to have a feeling about what I have done. I just have to wait and see. I'll post tonight my results. I am not transparent to post my beginning weight just yet. Maybe when I get to where I want to be I will be confident to post my beginning weight, but not yet. So I am sure you can guess that it is bad. So ridiculous to let my weight get so out of hand. To all my younger friends, I would say to get a handle on it now. Once you are 50, it is so much harder. I am exercising on the elliptical every weekday at 5:30. Not very happy about this. There's something wrong with going to sleep in the dark and waking up in the dark. Just shouldn't be!!!

Last night we had the privilege of attending our son-in-law's ordination service. We love Jay so much and are so proud of how he leads his family according to God's Word. Our daughter and grandchildren are surely blessed by having him. We love you Jay.

I have accountability at my house today at 11;30. I have met with these women for the past 6 years on a consistent basis. I love these women more than I can tell you. I know that I can call anyone of them anytime of day and they will be there for me. Recently, during Life Action Summit at our church one of the speakers said accountability is only as good as what you are willing to put on the table. This describes our group so well. We know that we can trust each other with whatever is going on in our lives. I love these women.

Guess who's packing?

This has been Jonathan and Jenna's humble abode for the past 8 months, but we are in the process of packing them up. God has called Jonathan to Crossgates Baptist Church in Brandon, MS and they will be packing up today and leaving tomorrow. We are so excited for this opportunity for them, but I have to say it is somewhat bittersweet. Please don't misunderstand me, there is no place I'd rather my children be than in the complete middle of God's will, but he is my baby and I will miss getting to see them all the time. He is going on staff to serve as the middle school pastor. This is an incredible opportunity for both of them and we are so grateful to our Lord for working in their lives.

We have spent several hours packing all these tubs. They have only been married since April, but they had alot to pack up. We are not going down with them for the move, but I will be going down next weekend to help.

I just want to say to both Jonathan and Jenna that I love you and am so very proud of you. I love watching your love for the Lord and how it plays out in your lives. God has great plans for you and I think I am thankful that for this move it is only across state lines and not oceans. I love my baby boy.

weekend fun with our babies

This past Saturday we had planned to take the kids to the Bartlett Christmas parade because the weather was so nice and the parade was to begin at 4:00. We thought this would be plenty of time to go to the parade before the cold front came through. Wrong. We took the kids to the mall first and we left at 3:00 to go to the parade. When we left it was very nice outside. By the time the parade started we were freezing. We had lots of covers, but it still was not enough. Lucy did not move the whole time. She was freezing.

Below is a picture of K, B, and some of their friends enjoying the parade. They did not seem to be bothered by the cold.

Before we went to the parade we met my friend Karen and my niece Amy at the mall with their children and godchildren. We ate, jumped on the spider jump, rode the carousel and played at the playground. A great time was had by all, except Pop who wears out pretty early and took Lucy home to give her a nap before the parade.

On Friday night we took the kids to Paint a Piece to paint their own ornaments. We did Lucy's handprints first and Pop took her on home while I stayed with the big kids to finish theirs. They loved doing it. Karis chose to do a Christmas tree and Brayden chose to do a dog bone in honor of their former dog Jackson. Go figure! Gotta love him.

We are so thankful for this Christmas season and that they are close enough for us to get to enjoy all the festivities of the season with them. We know not to take any time we have with them for granted. We are thankful for the time God is giving us. My mom use to refer to her time with my children as making memories and that is what I like to think we are doing everytime we are with them. I love them so.

Remembering a Gentle Man

Two days ago on December l, this sweet man, better known as Papa would have been 85 years old. It's been 4 years since he died suddenly of a massive stroke. Sometimes it seems like only yesterday since I watched him enjoying his grandchildren and then sometimes it seems like years ago that I heard him say "I was just calling to check on you".

My dad was as much of a gentleman as anyone I have ever known. He took care of my mom as if she was his princess. He loved my brother and I in the same way. Then came his grandchildren and great children. Oh how he loved them. He loved nothing more than having the grandchildren at his house.

I got my love for children from my Dad. I can't remember him ever seeing a baby and not holding it. He had a real love for babies and children. He loved everyone of our foster babies as if they were his. I even remember seeing his heart break a few times when a baby would leave our home that he had become especially attached to. I hated this for him because my parents didn't sign up to put their hearts on the edge like we did. They stood by us none the less and shared in the joy of each new placement that we got.

If you have your parents still with you this Christmas season, give them an extra hug and never fail to thank them for what they've done for you and what they mean to you. Both of my parents were here one minute and gone the next without any warning. I still miss them terribly and would give anything for them to see Mike and I enjoying grandparenthood as much as they did.

OFF SABBATICAL!!!

Well, I'm back. I know it has been a long time. For the past three months I have been extremely busy preparing for a faithwalk that took place three weeks ago. That is over now and I am back to my computer. I started this blog in order to have a record for my children and grandchildren and I plan to follow through.

I have had some serious withdrawals from the grandkids during this time. Although I have been able to see them some, it just hasn't been the same. They were here two weekends ago and we had a blast with them. We took them to the mall that Friday night and let them ride the carousel, play on the playground and jump on the spider jump. Lucy got to jump this time and liked it just like her siblings. This has been one of their favorites for the past year. Karis and Brayden love to jump so high. I tried to upload a video of this, but to no avail. Just a little bit over my computer skills.

Christmas is just around the corner and we are getting so excited. Last year we started a new tradition with our family. We chose not to buy gifts, but instead take a trip. We will leave two days after Christmas and head for the mountains. We are so looking forward to this trip. Ten years from now we would not remember what gifts we got on this Christmas, but we will always remember the trip we took. Making memories is one of my favorite things.

My next holiday tradition that I look forward to is shopping after Thanksgiving. We will head out late on Thanksgiving night and get in line at Target. We go prepared to withstand the cold temps and really have a great time. We spend literally hours in Target. It is so much fun. After our shopping spree we head out to eat for breakfast.

The festivities will begin this weekend when we put our tree up. Mike doesn't realize it's this weekend so don't tell him if you see him. He always dreads getting everything out of the attic and I don't blame him. But it is always worth it in the end.

I so much desire to always keep Christ the center of our holidays. It's so easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle, and forget the real meaning of the season. Lord, help me keep you in the center of all my thoughts and actions this season.

I have some posts to do of the kids, but I just wanted to let you know that I am back and looking forward catching up on lost time.

Love all of you, Lolli

What a difference a year makes

How can a year go by so quickly and change how you view life so drastically? One year ago today my life was forever changed. You see, I began my day doing what I always do. I was greeting the children that I keep and was so glad to see them after the weekend. My BFF, Karen, asked if I could keep her foster daughter who was 3 months old for her so she could go to an appointment. I had fed her a bottle, changed a dirty diaper and laid her down for a nap. When Karen returned around 11:30, we sat and talked for a few minutes and then she went in to get the baby up from her nap. Life changed in that instant. She came running out of the room with Kailah, frantically telling me she was dead. How could this be? Just two hours before she was a perfectly healthy 3 month old? We called 911 and while waiting for them to arrive we did everything we knew to do, but we knew it was too late. I can not begin to explain the sorrow, horror, fear that I experienced that day. The paramedics had trouble finding our house because of it being off the road. When they did get here they could not get in the drive with the firetruck because of our fence around the house. It seemed to be one delay after another. Once the ambulance arrived, Karen was able to leave in the ambulance with Kailah. I remained at the house. I could not reach Mike because he was in a meeting. People began arriving at the house. The investigators would not let anyone in the house because of it being considered "a crime scene". I remember walking around the house with my hands on my head crying not knowing what to do. After what seemed like a million questions I was freed to go to the hospital. All I wanted to do was to get to Kailah and Karen.

The rest of the day was a whirlwind. After having to leave the hospital we returned to the Johnstons house. No one was ready to face going to my house. Luckily when I did return later that night, a very dear friend had been there and cleaned everything up.

The next few days brought more sadness than I had ever experienced. I knew that beyond a shadow of a doubt that Kailah had not been hurt, but could not find any rest at all until the preliminary autopsy came back. Of course, they found no reason for death and ruled it SIDS.

I have heard our pastor speak of being in the room when someone who is a Christian dies. He says he feels like he is on Holy Ground because he believes that Jesus actually enters the room of the one dying and takes their spirit back with Him. I was reminded that during the hustle and bustle of my day one year ago, unknown to me at the time, Jesus entered my home and left with the soul of a very precious little girl. I will never understand what took place that day until I am in Heaven with my Jesus, but He is the ultimate Conforter and Healer.

I am so thankful for friends and family that surrounded us during that time. You are more special than you will ever know.

Life is good today, but because of what I have experienced one year ago, I will never view life like I did before, or take it for granted. God is good!

What a difference a year makes